That Day After Mother’s Day

CAMA2008

Sometimes Dads get a bad rap.

Bonus Dads get the shaft as well.

BELIEVE ME being a Mom is a lot of pressure, expectation, and nights up with sick/hungry/ornery kids.

But Dads are up most of those nights… pretending to be sleep…. trying to figure out how to guide the family, feed the family, keep the family alive, and maintain the calm “I got this because I’m a MAN ” exterior.

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Noah has done hard things the last 2 years. Personally he has climbed mountains. Emotionally he has traveled galaxies. He smiles more, makes amazing Dad jokes, and truly thinks about his impact on my children. On HIS children.


Here’s to you Dad. Enjoy your mini humans today. Get ready those surprised faces at the handmade cards. Don’t forget to hug your partner because they worked REALLY hard to keep your gifts a secret (read: children who don’t understand the meaning of surprise).
Remember the children go to you because of that awesome level of trust you’ve built AND that universal rule that “What Mom doesn’t know won’t hurt her” 😏

 

Happy Father’s Day to you my love. You are doing the hard things.

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Grace: Take some and pass it on

Ever have a day that feels like it belongs in a heavily scripted reality show?

That is about 60% of my days. Maaaaaybe a smidge closer to 80% on a good day.

Some days I feel like I’m OWNING it. Kids wake up nice, I manage an entire hamper of laundry for 3 humans, read my devotional, feed the baby, AND remember to feed myself.

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Some days I feel like it’s Freaky Friday and I’m the kid in Mama’s fabulous body. Everyone watches TV, attempts to recreate every Star Wars battle scene, the dog almost gets lost, the baby screams all day, and then it’s 6 and husband is asking “What do you want to do for dinner”. Bless his heart

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Sour Patch

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Could we not….

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First Born = Well trained 

In these moments… every one of these moment… good and hilarious. Parenthood is the only job you are given without applying or having any previous experience. Motherhood is TOUGH. It can feel lonely, overwhelming, unbelievable at times but the pay off is SO worth it. I think. I hope. We will see 😂
I have been reminded this week that we all need a LOT of grace.


It’s not by my own power that I wake up every day and handle these Minions.

It’s not by my own batteries that I make it through every day.

In those overwhelming moments when I feel like everything is crashing down … I have to remember (and sometimes say out loud) I am a rockstar, I am awesome, I am more than enough.

His grace is more than enough to cover all my shortcomings.

All those times I wasn’t so patient. Those days I give up and say “ice cream for breakfast”.

it is TOTALLY okay to reach out and say “today is rough” to your Village.

 

So I will power through those days. I’ll hear my friends who are struggling and lift them up. I will practice patience when my children spill an entire canister of grits on the kitchen floor and look at me to clean it up.

Sweeping builds character 😏

 

Destination Unknown 

It’s been a while. I apologize but you know birthing a human takes a lot out of you. 

Chibi Noah (not Jr because Dad has a thing lol) was born swiftly on April 20th. After 3 … yes 3 trips to the hospital and 3… yes 3 times being sent home. 

He is a tiny, wrinkled, grumpy ball of love. We were already complete but he is our whipped cream, sprinkles, AND hot fudge. Hungry now? I sure am

I am now a part of the 4 Club. Noah is now a Dad of 4. We are a blended family is epic ness. 

And no one is sleeping. 

Seriously. 

My body has turned into a Super Milk Factory. My nurse commented that I was producing enough for twins. I don’t have twins. I have a 6 pound ball of fluff. So long and thanks for all the fish. 

Dad is sleeping so light you’d think he was waiting for Zombies to appear. First Time Newborn Dad Life. 

The Trio enters my room with bated breath every morning. Anticipating the newest adorable thing their baby brother will do. 

Did I mention I forgot what sleep was? Oh I did… my apologies. 

Life marches on. We are all finding our lanes. Mine is recovering my entire physiology but whatevs. 

I don’t know where we’re going but I foresee many bathroom breaks, detours, and hilarious rest stops along the way. 

I Did A Thing… 

So you’ve had a baby. 

You enjoy your 48 hours away from your children. You revel in the 24 Hour Bouncing Service (Nurses don’t get the credit they truly deserve). You wake up to HOT food 3 times a day. 

Then it’s time to be released back into the fray. Baby in tow. 

Your looking good on the drive home. Then Day 3 hits. All Hell breaks loose. 

Why did I birth a human?

Why did I leave the hospital?

Why can’t there by lifetime epidurals?

So today on Week 2 Day 2 (as my life has become a weird version of Star Trek) I did a thing. One of the most asinine, odd, and ridiculous things ever designed. 

I took a sitz bath. 

EUREKA!!!

This 2-3 inches of warm water has solved my world problems, made the pain bearable, and renewed my outlook on life. 

Don’t knock it till you’ve tried it folks. 

Family Vacation. 2016 Style.

I am not an outdoors kinda gal but man do I love being hidden among the trees. I wanted to take the family up to Northern Arizona and hide out for Christmas. Mr was not having that soooo compromise we went for a weekend in early December.

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I was convinced there would be snow. It’s December in Northern Arizona. OF COURSE there would be snow.

And then there was a freak warm-up. Which equals no wintery snowfall for the bunnies. Such is life.

Now I will be completely transparent … before getting married I would not have ever entertained the idea of being outside of the Metro Phoenix Area. I loved the sounds, busyness, and hustle and bustle of life.

 

Then I 2015 hit me with a ton of bricks and I realized my heart craved wide open spaces (Hey there Dixie Chicks) and air to breathe. I guess it helped that Noah is an outdoor enthusiast lol

Thankfully I was able to find a pseudo cabin (read Wifi and Flat screens) So everyone was happy.

Positive: It was cold enough to save a patch of snow. So at least we (the kids) could get nice and cold 🙂

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Ending 2016 the way we started was important to me.

This year was full of curve balls but we are still one.

Family.

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-Tiana-

 

Christmas 

Last Christmas I made it a point to be present in all of my pictures. 

The result…. a tripod, remote timer, and 300 pictures from Christmas Morning 2015 that are still untouched. 

THIS year I decided I didn’t touch my camera. It sat on it’s little shelf unaffected by being left out of the festivities.  I didn’t take it to any family gatherings, to the dismay of my family members. Oops. 

Whatever space was left on the good old iPhone (can we PUHLEEZE talk about this internal storage issue Apple) was all there was. 


This was our Christmas. I know husband actually said he was glad I wasn’t stressed about the camera. I got to rest and see my kids interact with each other. AND Mama got a nap. 

The captured moments are great. But living behind my camera is getting in the way of being a human. So ending Crazy Train 2016 with a smile in my heart and 3 happy kiddos. 

-Tiana 

Family 

So here we are. Right back where we started. Or left off. Or whatever. 

Life took a CRAZY turn that nooooo one expected so soon. 

More to come on all that Jazz

But here we are. Family. 

I have been wide awake since 4:45 am on our first family with visions of Sugarplums.

Who am I kidding? 

 No one sleeps in on vacation. I’ve been awake just because I haven’t figured out how to relax. 

At 6:01 I got a knock on my door asking about video games. You can only imagine where they inherited the “early as humanly possible” gene from 😉

Popping in to say “Cheerio. I’m still here with a lot to update” 

Enjoying our time together. 

Now excuse me while I enjoy this garden soaking tub. 

-Tiana- 

Finding Joy.

This one is for the Parent Club.

This Summer has been tumultuous to say the least.

Schedules changed. Plans were WAY different. I have been thrust back into my dual roles of Stay At Home/Working Mom.

Oh yea and I am still technically a Newlywed.

What was he thinking?!

A wonderful friend of mine reached out to me during her own storm and asked that I stand with her in finding Joy Bubbles all around us. It was difficult at first because I just wanted to sit in the bathtub and consume Ben & Jerry’s all day long.

BUT let me tell you… it has been amazing.

As it stands we have 7 days to find a place, move, AND find school for the kiddos. During all of this BOTH of our cars decided to go all Temperamental Teenager on us.

I am finding JOY in this storm. I am rejoicing during this only because I know who is in control.

 My Bubbles

My Trio are safe.

They are happy.

Dylan has started making coffee every single morning. No messes involved at all.

All 3 kids are becoming more self sufficient and I get to enjoy being their Mom instead of their Nanny/Maid/Personal Problem Solver. Although I am super awesome at all of these jobs. 

I am teaching and in love again. With dance, with photography, with life.

I have more friends than  I ever needed.

  

I challenge you to count your bubbles. During good times and bad. Make it a habit so that when your storms come, you can see the light behind the clouds.

 

-Tiana-

Someone get me off this train. The Princess is 5

Here we are again..

Yet ANOTHER Birthday…Because Summer Babies are what I do best 😉

Adele turned 5 and in typical “Little Girl” fashion…walked right into expressing her own inner Janet Jackson circa 1986.

IMG_6160-3.jpgthis is in the midst of our argument about what is “pretty enough” for a tea party and a confetti balloon exploding.

Love seeing her interact with her friends and revel in having her own personal Birthday time. #thirdkidproblems.

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Sadly we have another July Birthday in our home. Otosan’s birthday is the very next day. His special moment waltzing into 30 may have been slightly eclipsed by the Princess but we mad sure to get him a cupcake as well.

 


Thankful for this life we live. 

Thankful for the fact that I get a month off before Middle Born turns 7. 

It’s all about perspective y’all. 

-Tiana-

Don’t.

This week has been heavy. It’s been dark. It’s been difficult to manage.

Without the kids being in school they were not faced with The Conversation regarding current events in our world.

Thankfully I didn’t have to field pointed questions from my 9-year-old that require a carefully navigated answer. No fluff around here folks. My kids want to facts.

I did not watch the news with them, just so  I would avoid crying and have to then explain why Mommy’s heart is aching.

did overhear a group of young women in my apartment complex discussing this week.

They were having an honest to goodness town hall meeting while listening to music regarding our… more specifically their safety as African-American women in America.

I wondered if their parents had been able to take the time to sit down as a family and speak about the atrocities.

I wondered if their parents were honest with them. And to what end.

I wondered if their home was an environment that fostered healthy debate.

It hit me that having mixed children I would have to start creating such an environment.

That I would have to explain to them that, although God made them special and wonderfully unique that some people may not like them. Some people may target them. I will have to explain that this may never happen to them personally but they will witness it in some shape or fashion.

I will continue to raise them as I always have.

The only deviation being I will not avoid uncomfortable situations at all costs.

I can’t.

I will NOT become a fear monger or anti-human.

I can’t.

I will continue to encourage them to ask questions respectfully, speak up for the little guy, and pray for everyone (regardless of their own opinions) because THAT is what we believe.

All that being said… my petition to my fellow Adults of the Planet Earth….

don’t be that guy(or gal).

they are watching us.

they are expecting us to protect them.

they are expecting us to protect ourselves.

because that is how we have raised them.

-Tiana-